Ayn Rand has been bugging me
lately, but then so have stink bugs. Now stay with this meandering journey, and
you’ll come to find how they are connected.

Many of us know Ayn Rand as the
author of “The Fountainhead” and “Atlas Shrugged,” among other things. Rand was
an ex-patriot from Russia who made it to Hollywood and then to New York in the
1930’s. Born in 1905 (as Alisa Rosenbaum) with a silver spoon in her mouth that
was yanked out by the Bolshevik Revolution, traumatized Rand became forever
reactive to her loss of family wealth. She evolved to become the flame thrower
for the “rationality of selfishness,” which, of course, is the diametric pole
of the collective. Torching the tension between the one and the many, she
proclaimed the virtue of selfishness to be the reasoned view. Indeed, we all
need to be differentiated individuals, an “I,” not just part of the “many.”
Every child needs to learn to become an adult and “individuate” from the
family’s “group grip.” However, becoming one’s own person doesn’t mean “going
it alone.”

We need our families sometimes
and they need us sometimes as well. Unless our families have mercilessly abused
us, we generally keep connected as well as, hopefully, differentiated. Likewise
with couples: the dance of the “I” and the “we” is ongoing. Partners need to
have their own individual lives (the “I”); yet they also come together to
enjoin in the “we” (togetherness, connectedness). This process continues as
much as an ocean’s wave ebbs and flows. So too with communities and cultures.
In some cultures, the “we” is more the focus than the “I.” In our culture, the
“I’s have it. Nevertheless, to go to the extreme “I” of Ayn (yes, it is
pronounced “I”) Rand is to disregard the necessity of the tension between
polarities. You really can’t have one without the other. “I” and “we”—it’s a
marriage that can never divorce!

And so the other side of Ayn
Rand for me is precipitated by a stink bug. The other night, as I lay sleeping,
a stink bug decided to attempt to snuggle inside my nice warm, dark ear. I
awoke screaming, yanking at the insect with my fingers. I extracted most of the
bugger but decided to go to the ER. The nurse noted “there is something black
still in your ear.” She gave me anti-biotic drops and urged me to see my
physician for follow up. After the weekend, I went to the ear, nose, and throat
specialist who informed me, “There is debris laying on your ear drum.” And, by
the way, “how is your hearing?” He flushed out the ear with some sort of
solvent, then had me take a hearing test. Fortunately, my hearing was okay.

How does this relate to the
non-relational Ayn Rand? I wondered to myself what would have occurred in that
scenario had I not had health insurance or the means, wherewithal and presence
to get myself to the ER and the M.D. afterwards. People who have no health
insurance, who are barely making ends meet haven’t the luxury to take care of
themselves properly. I do think that this is where community and the common
good come in.

Of course, I like my
independence and want to be my own quirky individual self, but that doesn’t
preclude my from being connected to my community. I believe we do need to heed
the call of the common good. No one can really be a rugged individualist
without the help of others along the way.

[Note: For more on Ayn Rand, I
recommend the book, Goddess of the Market by Jennifer Burns.]

* Kayta Curzie Gajdos holds a doctorate in counseling psychology and is
in private practice in Chadds Ford, Pennsylvania. She welcomes comments at MindMatters@DrGajdos.com or (610)388-2888. Past columns are posted
towww.drgajdos.com.

[Editor’s
Note: Two videos with Jennifer Burns speaking about Ayn Rand are available on
YouTube. They are less than 10 minutes long. Go to

www.youtube.com/watch?v=8rY8Zt3VIdY
or

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRJD0_7z-7E&feature=related