“What
do psychologists do”? Some people may wonder. Even I, as a psychologist, don’t
know all the possibilities and definitions that my own profession may include.
I’m
writing this article from California where I have just attended the 118th
annual convention of the American Psychological Association.
The
program agenda was listed in a catalog the size of a small city’s telephone
directory. It amazed me as to the breadth and depth of presentations, from neuroscientific
research on mirror neurons to climate change and its social justice
implications; child development to issues of aging; disaster response to post
traumatic stress disorder; peace psychology to military psychology.
I
believe the last time I attended an APA annual convention I had just completed
a master’s in clinical psychology and had begun my doctoral work; I even
presented a paper, the title of which I cannot recall. That was 1970-something.
This
time, although not a presenter, I was delighted to find presentations on topics
dismissed or unheard of in the 1970s. Hardly a soul discussed how mindfulness
and meditation might help emotional regulation and reduce anxiety. Hardly a
soul then discussed intergenerational trauma and its subtle (and not so subtle)
cascade of emotional and physical stressors coursing down the family tree. Few
then discussed sexual abuse—in families or otherwise. In the 70s, post Kinsey (who made no
judgment regarding incest in his vast study of sexuality but who did document
the existence of incest in families), the women’s movement opened the door for
women to have a voice regarding sexual and physical abuse. Rape crisis centers
were still practically unheard of.
What
may have been intuited by some of us 40 years ago is now being validated by
neuroscience. This is heavenly to me to know that my 40 years of educated hunch
is now “evidence-based.” Yes, John Bowlby, a British psychiatrist, documented
separation and attachment disorders in infants and children after WWII. T.
Berry Brazelton, MD, has likewise dedicated his career to infancy and
attachment bonding. However now in the age of neuroscience we find that for the
developing brains of infants and children, interaction with the environment is
crucial—that particularly translates into the caregiver (mother, father,
whoever) relationship with the child as of utmost importance.
The
mirror neurons of the caregiver interact with the mirror neurons of the child,
creating lasting bonds. (Actually, whenever we interact with one another our
mirror neurons are dancing together.) What also helps create bonds is the
chemical oxytocin, the “birthing chemical.” Now studies show that oxycontin
(pitocin) which increases in the mother during labor and delivery and during
nursing, is actually a biochemical that can promote empathy and attachment.
Studies are addressing how else oxytocin might be used to alleviate pain or
augment caring relationships.
Dr.
Seth Pollak’s research gives credence to the family therapist’s long abiding
belief that children are emotional barometers of their parents.
In
his study, children who have been abused or neglected in their families
appeared to be able to “read” anger in another’s face more rapidly than normal
children and that they also had a harder time calming down after simply
“overhearing” a simulated argument between supposed researchers (who were in
fact actors).
Another
program (which, unfortunately, I was unable to attend) highlighted the
prevalence of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and TBI (traumatic brain
injury) as the long lingering effects of the protracted wars in Iraq and
Afghanistan.
My
hunch is that in terms of intergenerational trauma and the effects on children
and families, PTSD and TBI will be having an immense ripple effect on
developing brains and adult behaviors (the rise of suicides, substance abuse,
domestic violence).
Ironically,
leaving the conference in San Diego, I took a detour by train to Monterey to
visit my son. I couldn’t help but observe a very anxious woman with her
children coming up to the ticket line behind me. She was fretting and one of
her preteen children was complaining. I figured, eh, par for the course, get to
the train station in a dither, once she gets baggage taken care of, she and her
brood—somewhere between the ages of 12-16—will get some OJ or coffee at the
special free reception area (for the sleeping car passengers) and they’ll all
settle down.
Not
happening. The mother continued to be anxious worrying about when to board the
Red Cap and on and on. (I give her credit for raising socially conscious
kids—her daughter attempted to throw trash away but not use the recycling
container. When she asked what to do, the café attendant turned the blue can
around so that the recycling logo was hidden! (Child idealism down the tubes!)
Anyway,
anxious mother remained in a tizzy as she scurried to the Red Cap.
I
thought perhaps she would chill when she got settled on the train. Hours later,
I heard her talking frantically to her children about how her bag has been
stolen and now what ever will she do—everything was in that bag, oh my God, oh
my God …
Minutes
later I noticed our cabin attendant Toni with purse in hand. I asked the very
observant Toni, “What happened?” She sighed, saying that the lady really left
it herself in another car on the train. We both silently acknowledge that this
woman needed “to chill”.
Now
I don’t know what this mother’s story was and why she could not self soothe.
She and her kids were well-dressed, she didn’t appear to be economically
distressed.
She
appeared, however, to be in a constant state of emotional dysregulation. She
was “awfulizing” and “generalizing”and in “all or nothing” thinking mode.
“If
we don’t have the family bedroom on the train, we’re lost” rather than “we’ll
make it work.” “My purse has been stolen” rather than “gee I wonder where I
left it.”
I
don’t know what this woman’s history was to keep her in this hyper-vigilant
state. Perhaps it was situational and created by some immediate happenstance.
My guess is that this is her modus operandi a lot of the time.
I
wondered about her children. They seemed well behaved and actually rather
quiet. I wondered if they, as emotional barometers, were always trying to
ascertain or read mother’s next crisis. What were their emotional states like?
Surely
there was a family dynamic being created here that would have its lingering
effects.
So it
goes for the peripatetic psychologist, witnessing psychological theory in situ.
* Kayta Curzie Gajdos holds a doctorate in counseling psychology
and is in private practice in Chadds Ford, Pennsylvania. She welcomes comments
atMindMatters@DrGajdos.com or 610-388-2888. Past columns
are posted towww.drgajdos.com.
Dr. Kathleen Curzie Gajdos ("Kayta") is a licensed psychologist (Pennsylvania and Delaware) who has worked with individuals, couples, and families with a spectrum of problems. She has experience and training in the fields of alcohol and drug addictions, hypnosis, family therapy, Jungian theory, Gestalt therapy, EMDR, and bereavement. Dr. Gajdos developed a private practice in the Pittsburgh area, and was affiliated with the Family Therapy Institute of Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic, having written numerous articles for the Family Therapy Newsletter there. She has published in the American Psychological Association Bulletin, the Family Psychologist, and in the Swedenborgian publications, Chrysalis and The Messenger. Dr. Gajdos has taught at the college level, most recently for West Chester University and Wilmington College, and has served as field faculty for Vermont College of Norwich University the Union Institute's Center for Distance Learning, Cincinnati, Ohio. She has also served as consulting psychologist to the Irene Stacy Community MH/MR Center in Western Pennsylvania where she supervised psychologists in training. Currently active in disaster relief, Dr. Gajdos serves with the American Red Cross and participated in Hurricane Katrina relief efforts as a member of teams from the Department of Health and Human Services' Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.Now living in Chadds Ford, in the Brandywine Valley of eastern Pennsylvania, Dr. Gajdos combines her private practice working with individuals, couples and families, with leading workshops on such topics as grief and healing, the impact of multigenerational grief and trauma shame, the shadow and self, Women Who Run with the Wolves, motherless daughters, and mediation and relaxation. Each year at Temenos Retreat Center in West Chester, PA she leads a griefs of birthing ritual for those who have suffered losses of procreation (abortions, miscarriages, infertility, etc.); she also holds yearly A Day of Re-Collection at Temenos.Dr. Gajdos holds Master's degrees in both philosophy and clinical psychology and received her Ph.D. in counseling at the University of Pittsburgh. Among her professional affiliations, she includes having been a founding member and board member of the C.G. Jung Educational Center of Pittsburgh, as well as being listed in Who's Who of American Women. Currently, she is a member of the American Psychological Association, The Pennsylvania Psychological Association, the Delaware Psychological Association, the American Family Therapy Academy, The Association for Death Education and Counseling, and the Delaware County Mental Health and Mental Retardation Board. Woven into her professional career are Dr. Gajdos' pursuits of dancing, singing, and writing poetry.
