When I chose to have my son at home, I did a lot of research. I researched the safety aspects. I learned about all the potential risks. I interviewed OBs and midwives and chose the provider that was the best fit for me and my growing family. I was blessed to have a healthy, uncomplicated pregnancy.
Nevertheless, I mapped out the routes and times to the closest hospitals in case there was an emergency. I planned for the best, but prepared for the worst. I made sure my partner was authorized to talk to doctors in case we had to go to the hospital, and my wishes for my care were documented so he wouldn't have to guess.
I truly believe the way a woman chooses to give birth is her first decision as a parent. That plan may not always play out the way she envisioned, but there is power in making the decisions involved in pregnancy and labor.
Another of my firm beliefs is one of the most loving and protective things a person can do for their family is have a health care emergency plan in place.
In my last column I discussed the advantage of officially naming guardians for your child in the event of an emergency. You can round out your planning by documenting your wishes for who has access to your health information, who can make decisions for you, and what guidance you give when you are unable to voice it yourself.
You've probably heard of a Living Will (even if you didn't know its name). It's the document that gets the most press because when people don't have one we end up reading about families arguing over end of life care for someone they love. They are ordinary people in extraordinary — but not impossible — situations. Making a Living Will is an opportunity to let your family and doctors know what your wishes are, and to save your family the stress and grief of having to decide on their own.
More frequently though, is a short-term emergency. It's important to name an agent for decision-making and access to your health information in case you are temporarily incapacitated. If you are in an unmarried long-term partnership, this is especially important for your family.
Getting your plan in order is a great way to empower your family and alleviate stress they may have if you have an emergency. It's a gift you can give them right now. Even if it's never needed, there is peace of mind from creating a plan now rather than reacting if a situation arises.
Now, I know, these are not topics anyone other than a lawyer wants to talk about. That is exactly why I urge people to talk about it now, before it's needed. Make decisions before you're under pressure. Document them. Make sure your family knows. Use this column to break the ice next time you sit down with your family--”Hey Hon, I read an article by a woman who had her son at home, and she made some good points about making plans. It got me wondering-What are your thoughts in case I have to make decisions for you?” Start the conversation.
For further information about health emergency planning, check out Crozer Keystone Staff’s recent article What’s Your Game Plan in An Emergency?
Come out to the Upper Chichester Health and Safety Fair on Oct. 4, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., at the Municipal Building on Furey Road to talk to Valerie Borek, Esq. in person.
About Valerie Borek
Valerie Borek, Esq. is a Delaware County native with a passion for empowering people. She believes a strong family is a building block to strong communities. She founded her law firm to serve families with a focus on parenting and family rights. As a mother herself, she knows that parents face tough choices and need support. Valerie is grateful to be in a profession where she can guide people through life’s circumstance so they can focus on the things in life that matter most. Valerie finds her greatest motivation in helping families strengthen their health and wealth. These two foundational areas of life resonate through the day-to-day and when we feel comfortable and secure in these spheres, we are free and enabled to create and nurture the lives we desire. Visit her at www.vboreklaw.com
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